Title: (for the very) First Time
Warnings: Mention of past underage sexual encounters that could be triggery. Quite a bit of sex. And because it’s Puck nearly every other word is the ‘F’ one so there’s a LOT of swearing.
Pairing(s): Puck/Kurt, other background Gleek pairings, past Puck/many others.
Genre: Let’s call it ‘Drama’ shall we? Does that encompass angst, humour, smut and schmoop?
Word Count: 28,514
Disclaimer: I own nothing. (the walrus says he weeps for me, and deeply sympathises)
Summary: Puck’s still got a first time he can give Kurt. At least he can if a) Puck can get him to understand that, b) Puck doesn’t fuck up, and c) if the prissy little shit’ll stop treating Puck like a fucking girl and just take it.
Author Note: In the note to my oneshot ‘Like a Virgin’ I said I was going to do a proper Puckurt follow up. Well, it’s only… *checks watch* eight weeks later and here it is! (Just in time to get Jossed by Season 2! Yay!)
This story… Jesus. It just became ‘The Fic That Won’t End’ and got longer and longer because they were both being such stupid, uncommunicative boys and I just could *not* get them to hurry along to the part with the fucking. To be honest, I’m not sure what I think of the whole thing myself. It’s pretty much 15 pounds of angst and 10 pounds of smut mixed up in a 5 pound bag of crazy. Still, you know. ‘Enjoy’ and all that.
A tip of the hat to alicebluegown16 for the scene where Kurt sings ‘Talk Dirty To Me’ and for the Stephen Lynch song! And, what the hell, she was so flatteringly psyched about this when I told her about it, so this is dedicated to audreytiphaine , ok? Hope you like it, honey.
As a side note, I seem to be developing a platonic OTP with my Puck/Santana friendship.
( touch... )
Yeah, so - don't know if anyone on my flist is into Glee at all? If you are, I've done some stories for the puckurt comm and one fill for the glee_angst_meme that you might want to look at if you've nothing better to do. :)
(if you're not then fyi, Glee is light, silly tv about a high school singing club. It's ridiculous, it's nonsense, it's... addictive as hell. Run, damn-it! It's too late for me but you could still save yourself!)
I'll probably post these here properly at some point but I'm tired so I'll just link at the moment. Stories are:
The one where I break Kurt's arm, the rest of the club's heart's, and skirt dangerously close to melodrama - untitled fill for the angst meme
The one where I saw Puck's pool-cleaning/MILF seduction business described as 'one big cluster-fuck of statutory rape' and decided to muse on his psycho-sexual history. And Santana's, for some reason - Like a Virgin
The one where I had very little sleep and made everyone drag up because I wanted to see Puck in a dress - Drag Me To Your Level
The one where I kill someone, fuck up everyone else, and break everyone on puckurt comm - Talk My Heart Away (and break me down)
For the last one the only excuse I can offer is that it had been a 'nice warm bath with a side order of razor blade' kind of a week and I'd subconsciously decided to take it out on someone. I'm now writing about buttsex and evil cats, so I'm not sure if my mental wellbeing has improved or declined...
General consensus of the group? Stephanie Myers needs to die. (there may be some bias in my extrapolation of the discussion there, but not much)
Seriously - a more creepy, disturbing text I have never read. And badly written? Baring in mind that this thing has been through the hands of an editor! Christ, if this were posted up as a fan fic - even on the pit of voles - I think it would end up a cult classic to rival 'My Immortal' (and yes, I have been spending a lot of time on tv tropes recently. How could you tell?)
I think I've worked out why Bella is so clumsy and faints all the time though. I think that all the blood that should be used to power co-ordination has been diverted to the 'whiny, petulant bitch' part of her brain - a part that is so big that her DNA had to spontaneously invent TARDIS technology in order to fit the mass of it into her skull.
Am probably still going to read the rest of them and watch the films though. *facepalm* Integrity and taste = epic fail.
Edit - just started watching the 1st film and can I just say - girl who plays Rosalie? Whoever you are, you have a frickin' incredible ass. My compliments.
* * *
And speaking of the TARDIS, did anyone else notice the enormous amount of Ho-Yay between the Doctor and Vincent in last night's episode or was that just me? It wasn't Amy's hand that he was holding to the end! *slash goggles firmly in place*
* * *
And to continue the tv tropes theme - discovered yesterday that someone had referenced one of my fics on the Firefly Fetish Fuel page!
My life is now complete...
Because not only did you make me willing to watch Mr Madonna's version of 'This Ain't Your Muvver's Sherlock 'Olmes (an' it ain't Sir Arfur's either)', but you actually made me willing to picture Jude 'My God His Arms Are Hairy' Law in a sexual situation! Admittedly in sexual situation with yourself, Robert, doing filthy, filthy, humiliating things to him.
(with a side order of Mark Strong doing nasty, evil things to you both. hey, why not?)
Spent a good, ooh, must have been five minutes ruminating on whether old Guy could have made Holmes and Watson look anymore gay for each other and decided - only by having them fuck each other on screen.
In case you're in any doubt whatsoever, I would have been even more willing to watch it had he done this.
Have decided to preemptively succumb to temptation and am searching Archive of Our Own for Holmes/Watson (Hotson?) fic as I type.
* * *
Speaking of Archive of Our Own, now that it's a new shiny year I can reveal that my Yuletide fic was The Way It Crumbles, a Sky High fic for tagalongcookies, who was kind enough to say it was liked.
I myself was mind bogglingly fortunate enough to get two - yes TWO - quite brilliant Hurt Locker stories; Steady Rollin' Man by Devilc and Improvising by eglow23. Please go and read them because they are fantastic!
* * *
Have watched two episodes of Glee, purely because the tv was on and my eyes were open, and while I found it reasonably entertaining I probably won't end up watching it again.
But I still managed to come away shipping Kurt and Puck. *facepalm* Is there some operation - like a lobotomy - that cuts away the slashy, sick parts of your brain and leaves just the sane bits behind?
Mind you, if they cut away all the insane parts of MY brain I would, like Pooh, be left with very little to show afterwards.
My incredibly in depth review? *holds out hand, waggles up and down* Meh.
Don't get me wrong, Hugh is, as usual, sideburned sex on sex masquerading as legs with an added layer of sex on top. And Liev isn't bad either. But general feel was a bit slapdash.
Oh well, have to see what Star Trek's like instead (which I am looking forward to like 'Woh!')
* * *
I have seen a couple of episodes of The Big Bang Theory and now have a horrible temptation to search for Sheldon/Leonard slash fic.
And speaking of slash fic, I am so glad certain Primeval writers have senses of humour. . .
* * *
HAPPY BIRTHDAY mysteriousaliwz !!!!
I haven't finished blackening your name in the fairytale fic yet, but hugs and kisses till then!
And, continuing our theme of motorcycles...
Title: Sometimes Danny doesn’t mind riding pillion…
Rating/Warnings: NC-17, slash
Word count: 2,956
Summary: In which closet doors are blown, everyone goes ‘huh’, and Connor gets a clue.
Disclaimer: If it was mine the show would be 10x as many dino’s, Ben Miller giving physics lectures and lots of long, lingering shots of half naked men… (god I wish the show were mine)
This one is for fififolle , fellow Danny fan, with apologies for not posting last night! Don’t worry honey, we will meet by the docks at midnight and go over the secrit pln for Quinn world domination!
Title: Come on over and see my chopper…
Rating/Warnings: NC-17, slash
Summary: Connor needs somewhere to stay.
Word Count: 3,181
Disclaimer: Not mine, yada-yada. The usual.
I'm using the Denial defence here and re-writing one tiny aspect of S3:03 - just that little bit at the end that TFWIC buggered up...
Dylan & Daisy = Diictodons. What?! I think it’s cute.
Blame Credit for the terrible pun in the title goes to Mr steamshovelmama !
Title: Like an Inelegant Ballet (with skinny jeans instead of tights)
Pairing: Connor Temple/Danny Quinn
Rating/Warnings: NC-17 - containing slash and stickiness and S3 spoilers.
Summary: Sometimes, when you rub things up the wrong way, sparks fly…
Word Count: 3,792
Disclaimer: Strangely enough; not mine. Just borrowed and made to do nasty things.
A/N: This one is shared out between three wonderful people. fredbassett , who suggested the handcuffs (more in spirit than fact, I’m afraid luv!); thefakebook , who suggested the ice cream (& ok, I totally cheated with your other prompts as well!); and telperion_15 , who said there was no way, never, nuh-uh that she was reading Quinn porn! To which I said; wanna bet? :)
It was meant to be just straight PWP porn and came out as something a bit more. Which, for some reason, I’m blaming on the ice cream.
( Read more... )
What is it about slash fiction that attracts me? Seriously.
Because, whilst I may be occasionally attracted to certain types of female – Zoe from Firefly and
So why does the idea of two guys together cream my pants? (and I realise this is probably far, FAR more information than you wanted).
Because I hardly read any het fic at all nowadays, it’s all guy-on-guy, and I’ve never even tried to write het. Also, if it’s possible within a fandom to have a slash pairing that just has that edge of wrong to it – Snarry for instance, or characters you wouldn’t really want to imagine naked, or real life pairings or my favourite yummy incest – then I am all over that like white on rice. Christ, one of my favourite recent fics was Supernatural’s Dean shagging his brother who was possessed by the spirit of their car!!
I have a much greater forbearance for the whole hetero-male lesbian fascination now. At least that’s fairly normal.
I have been watching Smallville (what?! Don’t look at me in that tone of voice) and though I’m valiantly resisting the urge to write Lex slash I have developed a fascination with Michael Rosenbaum (to go with my Chad Michael Murray obsession).
There’s just something about that upper lip scar that makes my mind go to nastybadwrong places. And I now have an idea for a Mike/Tom Welling PWP with Tom being a bit of a psycho. And I don’t want to write it ‘cos there’s the fun nastybadwrong place and there’s the disturbing, sociopathic nastybadwrong place and I have a feeling this one would fall on the ‘I like eating human eyeballs’ side of that line.
*looks sadly at brain*
I don’t like it when my mind goes to that place.
No, actually, for a variety of reasons I couldnt start taking the pills last night. So I had another night of sod all sleep *starts laughing hysterically*
They better bloody work when I start them tonight. Mr oddegg doesnt know how close he came to being smothered when he started snoring...
And here's fic! Which I said I'd post yesterday! Hah! (I lie like a rug)
On time people! On time!
Ok, you might not be as excited about that as I am. But as I've been disgustingly late with my last two I feel I'm entitled to some exuberance.
It's Harry Potter/Percy Weasley, btw.
I meant to post this last night, right after the other one. And all I can say in my defense is -
Bastard. Bloody. Modem.
Another rounds_of_kink claim. Harry Potter fandom with extreme warnings.
Right. So I’m a complete moron and didn’t post my last two rounds_of_kink claims on time.
*smacks self about a bit*
But it worked out ok in the end because the stories are actually related and I can link them together!
And this was, of course, entirely
Really, these ones were a bitch to write for some reason. I'm obviously not as kinky as I thought. *shrugs*
First one below, second one up in a bit.
This is my first rps and it stars the lovely boys from Supernatural – Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.
It hasn’t gone quite as planned actually.
I intended it to be a short, smutty, Jensen centered PWP but despite my best efforts it is instead plot filled schmoop with Jared POV – it’s also the longest thing I’ve posted so far! I did manage to keep some sex in there, but only by the skin of my teeth.
I don’t know, you try to raise them right…
*shakes finger at fic and sends it to sit on the naughty step*
So, anyhoo, here we are; oddegg and overtaxed brain proudly present the fruit of their loins – posted in separate parts and then linked together, because it's too big and I can NOT get LJ to co-operate with linking the cuts. Bastards.